Monday, January 30, 2012

Houston...We Have a Diagnosis

It's not good.

I actually worried about this when Shaina was pregnant. I may have even prayed that God would protect Chaia from it prior to her being born.

Genetically, we knew there was a chance she might get it, but we were trying to remain hopeful that she wouldn't.

But she's got it.

Chaia has been diagnosed with AHB.

I was born with it and it appears the apple has not fallen far from the tree.

AHB, also known as Abnormally High Buttcrack or in some medical dictionaries as 'plummer's crack' is a disease that is just not socially embraced. I encounter others frequently who show disdain for those who have the disease.

And some idiot had the bright idea of making low rise jeans normative, which in all honesty is an outright prejudice against those who suffer from AHB.

It doesn't matter what you try to do...Belts. Long Shirts. Elastic Pants. AHB always gets the last laugh

With all that Chaia has had to endure we were hopeful that this would not be added to the pile, but (sigh)...we weren't so lucky.

People make wise cracks about AHB and there's even a campaign out there to try and humiliate people with our disease:


Butt mark my words, no ifs, ands, or butts about it, I will crack down on AHB oppression so that one day, my daughter will be able to live without fear and she will know that being normal...

ain't all it's cracked up to be.

Working Towards a Better Tomorrow

(and hoping that you cracked up today).

Don't take yourself too seriously today.

5 comments:

Cindy Penrod said...

HA!! You are too funny. I don't even know what to say, except maybe, "You crack me up".

Anonymous said...

needed this SO MUCH today! you are totally ridiculous and we love you for it! thanks for making us smile from "cheek to cheek" :D

Jennet Gore said...

Shame on you Ben LOL, I saw your post on facebook and with a sense of dread opened your blog. I have since had to wipe off my computer screen, as it was covered with coffee. None the less, you made my day :)
Blessings to you and yours,
Jennet

Carly said...

haha, cute! Do you guys use cloth diapers? I find they go up higher than disposable, and hide the crack as well as contain the mess better. I'm sure at this point in time you have many more things to worry about than extra loads of diaper laundry

Anonymous said...

Oh Ben, you will be able to live with the AHB in Chaia, but it will be your worst nightmare when the "undie" strings show over the top:) Then we need lots of super long shirts--:) Denise S